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Getting to the root

“There are a thousand hacking at the branches of evil to one who is striking at the root.” – Henry David Thoreau As a practicing hypnotherapist, I am constantly seeing new clients, many of whom have never been hypnotized before. Often I’m asked, “Do you ever turn anyone away?”...

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Celebrate Your True Self

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in healing | Posted on 06-20-2017

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Jill with a GoatCelebrate Your True Self

One of the privileges of my profession is the opportunity to talk to people about feelings and problems in their lives on a deeper, more authentic level than the way most people normally relate to one another, even their friends. In general, people rarely open up about their goals, fears, and other parts of their inner world. I think this is sad because, quite frankly, that’s the best part of a person! For example, when I’m on Facebook and read the five things people list as “interests” on their profile, I’m far more curious to learn why those things are important to them, how those interests make them feel, and the story behind them.

True Disclosure – Over the years, I’ve had many members of Alcoholics Anonymous as clients, and all have told me that what they like best about going to their AA meetings is listening to other people share on a gut level about themselves, “warts” and all, and their sometimes-harrowing life experiences. Finding out that others have had similar feelings and humiliating incidents helps members to be less judgmental and more compassionate with themselves and the people around them.

True Purpose – One technique I use in my practice is past life regression, during which I guide clients into a deep trance state where it is possible to explore the actual purpose of their soul beyond present time and space. This is an amazing experience, as you can imagine, and through it, clients become aware of their own vital importance by discovering the special and particular reason they exist!

Truly Who We Are – Wouldn’t it be astounding if more of us tried to drop the mask we usually wear—you know, that all-important “impression management” façade—and were more authentically ourselves? Think how much easier it would be to get along with others. If only we could see that the image we put so much effort into projecting could never be more beautiful and interesting than who we really are.

True Love – If you want to find real love, let people see the actual you…the person I am so blessed to talk to during our sessions. You really are all so astonishing when you’re being “real.” Think about the great effort to maintain that acting job of being cool, confident, and together all the time, when inside you know you’re just faking it. It might help you to know that just about every person you think is SOOO confident, feels the same way you do inside. If you don’t believe me, try asking anyone about this (especially after they’ve had a glass or two of wine!), and you’ll see.

So, love yourself enough to let more of your freak flag fly! Even if people don’t “get” you, when all is said and done, the most important thing is that YOU get you.

**Yes, that is truly me with very little makeup, holding a goat cuz it sounded like fun. : )

Namaste.

Jill Thomas
760-803-2841
Healthy Habits Hypnosis www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com &
Soul Connect Hypnotherapy http://www.soulconnecthypnotherapy.com 

Do What you Love

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in healing | Posted on 04-26-2017

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Do What You Love

“I race only for fun” ~ Peter Sagan

Many of you probably don’t know this, but I am a huge cycling fan. One of my absolute favorite athletes is champion road bicycle racer Peter Sagan, and not only because he wins (a lot!), but because unlike many his competitors, Sagan really looks like he’s having fun doing his sport. This makes him a true pleasure to watch, and a bunch of other spectators seem to agree. Even though there are many more competitive racers, Sagan has one of the largest fan bases among cyclists. The same is true of Jens Voigt, who had a huge following even though he rarely won. After retiring from bicycling, he was able to make a smooth and successful transition to being a beloved commentator.

I use these examples to show that when a person is doing something they really love, the joy it brings them radiates outward and is very magnetic to others. Conversely, people who don’t seem to enjoy what they’re doing give off a vibe that tends to put off those around them.

I see too many people who entered a profession because it paid well and then grew used to earning a lot of money, but who lost their passion for it a long time ago despite still working in that field. It seems to me that this is the case particularly with real estate agents. No offense to this group—I respect the work they do and am friendly with many realtors—but so many I talk to are jaded and unenthusiastic, especially since making money in realty is way harder than it was before the latest recession. A lot of individuals in this job category are really hurting for business right now.

I know some of you are thinking, “I would love to follow my passion, but it doesn’t pay very much. I like to eat and drive a nice car!” Trust me, I totally get that, and it’s the reason I kept my sales job during the day while doing hypnotherapy and intuitive readings at night…for over six years! After I was laid off from my “day job,” hypnotherapy became my priority.

Most passions begin like a seed, which once planted, takes time to grow. Patience is needed, but if you truly love whatever your “thing” is, you will nurture it with your time, attention, and interest. The pleasure you derive from it in turn attracts others, who will appreciate your commitment and excitement. And if your gift can benefit them, they may be willing to pay you to share it!

Play with the idea of “If I could do anything, what would it be?” If you can’t think of a particular profession, consider how you would like to spend the hours in your day—what would you be doing?  Many years ago, I did this, and dreamt of talking to a variety of people, having chunks of time during the day to write, as well as the freedom to take breaks during the week “just because.” This is 100% of what I do now, and I can’t describe how much satisfaction and happiness I have.

Allow yourself time to fantasize…you might come up with some amazing ideas that could even change your life! Coming up with new options may take a while, but don’t stop exploring possibilities. And even if you need training for a new profession or have to work on building your clientele, time is going to pass anyway, so you might as well be doing what brings you joy.  Never forget that our time to play on this planet is limited, so it’s up to us to “only race for fun.”

*And if you want to watch Peter Sagan on TV check out the Tour of California May 11th 2017

 

Jill Thomas Hypnotherapist

Healthy Habits Hypnosis
187 Calle Magdalena #209
Encinitas, CA 92024
(760) 803-2841

www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com

What Accomplishment are you not Giving Yourself Credit for?

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in healing | Posted on 09-12-2016

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accomplishEvery day in my office, I see people who have accomplished amazing things! But rather than celebrate their achievements, they usually negate them with some statement that begins, “Yeah, but…”

“I have a PhD in mechanical engineering and recently got promoted BUT none of that really matters because I can’t seem to lose these last 20 pounds.”

“I am a medical doctor with a thriving practice BUT I have $100,000 in student loan debt…”

I’ll be honest here—I, too, downplay my accomplishments, which is one reason I understand the problem so well. Here’s one of my own examples: I wrote an excellent book about emotional eating called Feed Your Real Hunger. It earned great reviews, was a finalist in a writing contest, and is very well-written…BUT sales of the book were kind of underwhelming, so in some ways it feels like a failure.

Really, now. Who cares that much about 20 pounds? And most people have at least some debt, but how many are saving lives every day? Lastly, very few people write and publish books, even bad ones, so why focus on sales numbers? (I’m talking to myself here)

It seems like women are particularly prone to diminishing their triumphs. I once had a client who grew up in abject poverty, often going to bed hungry. When she came from her country of origin to the U.S. at the age of 12, she spoke very little English. This same disadvantaged woman overcame all of that and went on to be the first person in her family to get a college education. Then she blew past that and got a master’s degree, all while working two jobs, living with three roommates, and basically having no personal life for six years. How could she possibly have a “Yeah, but…”? According to her, she felt like a failure because she had a really hard time with public speaking. In her words, “I still feel like that confused 12-year-old girl who doesn’t understand what the teacher is saying to me.”

It doesn’t help any that the world will try to knock you down and convince you that even a one-in-a-million feat doesn’t really count. Unfortunately, the success of others often has the effect of bringing peoples’ insecurities to the surface, and the more they can criticize and discount, the less they have to face up to their own shortcomings. The thing is, life is not a bank statement where you look at your success-to-failure ratio to determine net worth. Life is something else far more satisfying than that.

 

Jill Thomas, Board Certified Hypnotherapist, weight-loss consultant, & author, has been a health and wellness professional for over 15 years, specializing in stress / anxiety reduction and attainment of holistic wellbeing.

Healthy Habits Hypnosis
187 Calle Magdalena #209
Encinitas, CA 92024
(760) 803-2841

To Be Creative, Go Play!

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in healing | Posted on 08-23-2016

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“Think about it deeply, then forget it, and an idea will jump up in your face.”
~ Don Draper to Peggy Olsen, TV episode of “Mad Men”

Most of us face challenges all day long, the solutions for which require at least some creativity on our part. What most people don’t realize is that “creativity” and “anxiety” are not friends. Anxiety significantly blocks your creative ability, causing you to miss solutions—even the most obvious ones—to any problem you face.

If you find yourself mulling over something too much, consider the wisdom from the quote above. Forget about the issue for the moment, and go see a movie, take a walk, or play with your animals. The key is to play, which is like a vitamin for building creativity. When you fortify your creative side, fresh options seem to appear like magic!

Think of your creativity as being a bit like a child, one who likes to play and responds very well when things are fun. Few of us are allow ourselves enough playtime, and the result is a lot of stress.

I practice playing myself, as you can see below:
Jill with a Goat
Yes, that’s me—a grown-up without a child in tow, who waited in line with a bunch of kids so I could get my picture taken with a baby goat. It sounded like fun!

If you are sitting around worrying about a problem, I cannot stress enough (pardon the pun) that you need to go play. The choices are clear: worry and misery, or fun and problem-solving. Decide for yourself that you are worth the happier option…you may be amazed at what opens up for you.


Jill Thomas, Board Certified Hypnotherapist, weight-loss consultant, & author, has been a health and wellness professional for over 15 years, specializing in stress / anxiety reduction and attainment of holistic wellbeing.

Healthy Habits Hypnosis
187 Calle Magdalena #209
Encinitas, CA 92024
(760) 803-2841

The Cluster of Fears

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 04-05-2016

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Usually when I work with a client on fears, we focus on one or two at a time. A client who is afraid of spiders usually doesn’t have other non-bug related fears to look at. The client who is afraid of flying typically isn’t afraid of heights as well. Usually these fears are the result of either a single traumatic event or having taken on someone else’s fear (such as a parent). But,  every once in a while I see a client who is afraid of a large amount of seemingly unrelated things—heights, flying, escalators, driving on the freeway, hospitals, tight places, etc. All of these at the same time typically aren’t about a single traumatic event that can be pointed to and healed.

At first glance, these fears may not seem related at all, but if you look deeper, you can see that the root fear is a loss of control. For example, if you are driving around the city and let’s say you blow a tire, you can easily pull over and deal with it. That is much more difficult at 70 miles per hour on the freeway, and it can feel like being out of control. The same can be said for flying. Once you get on that plane, there is no pulling over if you get uncomfortable and no bailing out.To make it worse, you can’t even use the bathroom unless they say it is ok.

For most people these things are a part of life that we have grown accustomed to dealing with, so to some extent, it’s not a big deal. If you are someone who suffered at times in your early life when control was taken away and you were violated, the loss of control in these situations can trigger negative feelings about these activities.

It’s been my professional experience that people who have what I call “a cluster of fears” were often the victims of long-term sexual violation, like being molested as a child over a period of years. Usually when these people come into my office, they have already been in therapy for quite some time. This is good because much of the work will have already been done. Yet, the damage left behind in the form of unhealed fears needs to be addressed.

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This makes it both harder and easier to work on. Harder because we have to look for a deeper, more painful injury that the client may or may not want to talk about. Easier because instead of looking for one or two events causing one main problem, we are looking for an event or events causing lots of problems in many areas of the person’s life. When you find those initial triggering events and clear the emotional charge, the person’s whole life can change for the better seemingly overnight. There is still work to be done, but the crippling symptoms (the fears) diminish; the person can begin to live more fully.

If you or someone you know is dealing with a cluster of fears, don’t wait to get help. On the other side of the pain you may temporarily experience while looking at those unpleasant memories is a peace and transformation beyond explanation available to you.

Love yourself enough to do the work of healing the deeper wounds. You are so very important to the world and so very worth healing.

 

Jill Thomas CCHT
Healthy Habits Hypnosis

760-803-2841
HealthyHabitsHypnosis.com

That’s Just Stupid!

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 03-22-2016

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One day I tripped over the cord of my expensive and much-loved digital recorder. This is a vital tool (as seen on Ghost Hunters, even!) I use in my office every day. Not only that, it was a gift from my husband.

recorderThe recorder fell in slow motion, landing with a thud and crunch that marked its end.  As I realized it was all over for my electronic friend, my mother’s voice echoed in my brain: “Jill, if you get too attached to things, God will punish you by taking them away!” Okay,  I won’t lie. I proceeded to bawl like a baby for about ten minutes before I heard another more practical voice in my head – my father’s this time – saying, “FedEx probably has a cutoff time to deliver. Better get on that, Jill!”

Well, if God really wanted to punish me, there would be no Amazon Prime, FedEx overnight rush delivery, and credit cards! Less than 16 hours later, Zen was restored when my new digital recorder and an extra large package of long-life batteries arrived.

Honestly, I don’t believe for one second that a Higher Power really cares that much about my digital recorder, but it did occur to me that for some reason, my mind had retained that sound byte from my mother’s belief system.

The truth is, all of us keep tons of old data in our psyches, usually things handed over by our families of origin. Most of these little “belief blips” are pretty harmless…like my mom’s weird idea about not leaving the light over the stove on too long because “that bulb is hard to change” (it’s not, by the way), or my father’s quirk about not using the garbage disposal too frequently because disposals are a “huge job” to replace (again, not true). But other family “wisdom,” especially limiting beliefs about money, can be very destructive.

At least every week in my practice, I help someone wrestle with, and hopefully shed, limiting beliefs about having, creating, and/or earning money. These clients’ old ways of thinking about money, if not addressed, keep them from achieving the life they want. Money is just one area affected by faulty thinking. Outdated attitudes about almost anything in our lives can cause big trouble.

Think of these bits of faulty logic as bad programming code, causing the computer (you!) to do something it shouldn’t or not do something it should!  If you replace the bad code with something new and better, life opens up in remarkable ways.

Sounds good, you may be saying. But just how do I do that?

img_glitch_01

Much of our outdated thinking can be eliminated simply by being recognized, and then acknowledged as ineffective or false. Others attitudes take more work, requiring you to recognize the behaviors you do that reinforce the faulty belief. One example is thinking that you will never be able to lose weight. If you keep trying the same old ways that you already know don’t work, your repeated failures reinforce that belief. If you want a different result, you must try a different approach.

The use of meditation is a tool for doing away with useless, worn-out beliefs. Place yourself into a meditative state by relaxing and focusing on the peaceful stillness underneath all those noisy thoughts. In this quiet place, imagine the specific limiting belief written on a chalkboard in front of you. Now, picture yourself erasing those old words, while thanking them for helping you in the past, and writing a new belief that is more in line with who you are now and what you want to create. This technique takes some practice, but it’s fun! Try doing it at least once a week.

Of course, if you would like help with this belief replacement process, or you would like to release a bunch of those self-defeating ways of thinking and acting, call me to schedule an appointment.

Your past does not have to dictate your future! Just because some principle or attitude was sacred to your mom or dad, doesn’t mean it has to be part of your thought system, too.

All of this said, if you find me curled into the fetal position, crying on the floor of my office next to broken pieces of my new digital recorder, you can probably assume that my mom’s old belief was true after all…

Jill Thomas CCHT
Healthy Habits Hypnosis

760-803-2841
HealthyHabitsHypnosis.com

 

Reclaim Your Childhood

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in healing, Uncategorized | Posted on 10-08-2015

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Reclaim Your Childhood

Many of us were denied things as children that would have helped us feel happier and more fulfilled as adults. Things like the ability to express ourselves through artistic interests like dance, drama, painting, or cooking, or not being allowing to pursue interests like astrology or tarot cards for religious reasons. For various reasons, parents can fail to see the need for freedom of expression, may not have the resources available to pursue these interests, or don’t want their children exploring the world that way. Often one sex is not allowed a particular interest because of cultural or religious beliefs like “girls don’t play hockey,” or “boys don’t cook.”

Denial of a child’s natural inclinations and interests can create and leave lasting resentment toward the parents, as well as a strong sense of sadness about “what could have been” if the child had been allowed to pursue his/her passions.

While you can’t rewrite your history, you can reclaim those passions and allow yourself to have what was denied to you as a child. In almost every community you can find adult dance classes, sports groups, art classes, or even acting classes. With a credit card and an internet connection, you can buy just about any book on any subject ever made and have it shipped to your home.

You can even take classes on astrology, intuition development, or mediumship. I attended one of James Van Praagh’s classes once, and a 75 year old woman stood up and told the group she was taking the class for the first time because she wanted “to learn how to talk to dead people while she was still alive.” Loved it!

It is never too late to pursue your dreams. I went to a 40th birthday celebration with a bunch of friends once, and the birthday girl made the announcement that she was going back to school to be a doctor. Another person in the group said, “You realize by the time you’re totally finished you’ll be 50.”

My friend replied, “I’ll be fifty anyway, so I may as well do what I want.”

I thought that was the most awesome answer I had ever heard.

While there is still breathe in your body and you have the ability to use your limbs, you are still capable of creating the life you want for yourself. Reclaim your childhood dreams, and if they still sound like fun, pursue them. I have yet to hear someone in my office regret pursing a dream no matter how unattainable it seemed. I have, however, heard plenty of people regret NOT pursuing something. Don’t be one of those people with regrets, and if you are, come in. I would love to see you. If you are not, go out and have some fun. If your version of fun is a pottery class near the beach, maybe I will see you there! Love yourself enough to release your past and pursue your dreams. You never know where they will take you.

Jill Thomas CCHT
Healthy Habits Hypnosis
760-803-2841
www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com
http://www.facebook.com/healthyhabitshypnosis
Author of the book “Feed Your Real Hunger” & “30 day weight loss Jumpstart” Hypnosis CD
For more information and free hypnosis meditations visit www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com

What losing weight won’t do

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 03-12-2015

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What losing weight won’t do

I recently had a sixteen year old boy come into my office for self-esteem issues, not terribly unusual. But what was unusual was his very insightful observation of how his previous efforts to fix this issue hadn’t worked.

“I am here because I recently lost a lot of weight, but it didn’t give me what I wanted. You see, I thought that if I lost all the weight, I would gain confidence and self-esteem, but that’s not what happened at all. In fact, I probably feel less confident than I did before.” I asked him why he felt less confident. “It’s hard to explain, but I feel like I’m not me anymore. Being a “big boy” was kind of part of who I was. It was my thing, especially on the football team, and now that I am not, it’s hard to know how I fit in. People treat me differently, and I am not sure I like it. Some people don’t seem to know how to treat me at all since the fat jokes don’t work anymore, so they avoid me. I admit I feel a bit lonely and out of place.”

I had never had someone more perfectly describe a very common issue with people who lose weight without the help of a counselor to work on the emotional part. But in his case, what was unusual was that he was actually able to see for himself how the change made him feel, and he perfectly describes one of the reasons why I think so many people lose significant amounts of weight and gain it back so quickly.

To some extent, being overweight becomes a big part of their identity, and when that’s gone, there is a need to adjust and redefine who they are. This is especially hard for teenagers because losing weight also changes who they are in the group. If it’s a girl, she is no longer the fat supportive friend. She might now be seen as competition for boys. If it’s a boy, they might no longer be seen as the funny fat friend, and again, might be seen as competition.

This is just as true for adults as it is for teens. When a person goes though a major change like losing a lot of weight, their whole lives change. While they might think those changes will be welcome and positive, change (even very good change) can be difficult because it causes them to make major adjustments and in the case of weight loss, it may be adjusting how they view themselves and their place in the world.

In session we worked on improving his confidence, and I also helped him see himself as the healthiest version of his body, not defined by his weight but by who he is. We also worked on updating the inner picture he has of himself so that he starts to reprogram the unconscious mind to say, “This is what I look like now. Let’s keep it that way.” The new version needs to feel more comfortable and familiar than the old version for him to have any chance of staying at this new, healthy weight.

Losing weight will not make you confident. You have to do that work on your own, but getting healthy will change your life in more ways than you can imagine, and often we are not prepared for just how much.

Jill Thomas CCHT
Healthy Habits Hypnosis
760-803-2841
www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com
http://www.facebook.com/healthyhabitshypnosis
Author of the book “Feed Your Real Hunger” & “30 day weight loss Jumpstart” Hypnosis CD
For more information and free hypnosis meditations visit www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com

Working from crisis mode

Posted by healthyhabi | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 02-23-2015

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Working from crisis mode

Imagine that you are traveling on your life’s path on a windy, stormy day. The journey is so hard that you have to stop and get directions to a short cut which helps, but you still don’t get very far because the weather is so bad.

Now, imagine the same journey on a day when the weather is bright, sunny and perfect. You can see where you are going. On this sunny day, you might think you don’t need to stop and ask for directions to a short cut, but when you did, it ended up being worth it. You realized you got much farther on your path.

In both cases, progress is made, but in one case, you are able to go farther. In fact, you may even go so far in your work that you are able to heal what caused the violent storm in the first place.

I wrestled with this issue with my own hypnotherapist many years ago. I would only call her for an appointment when I was desperate for help because of money issues. She would help me get to a better place. I would feel better and then stop coming. By doing this, I was never able to get to the deeper level of these problems to heal what was actually causing me to get into a bad place from the start.

One day she confronted me about this pattern. She said, “You only come in when you are in crisis mode. I am glad you come, but if you really want to heal, you need to continue when things are calmer so you heal the underlying issues that get you into crisis mode in the first place.” She was right, and when I was able to commit to working with her consistently, it made a huge difference. I made profound changes.

It’s a good idea to call and seek help from someone when you are in pain, but the results are even more powerful when you continue to work on yourself when the pain is gone, and the mind has lost the cloud of darkness around it. It’s like swimming in clear, calm waters. You travel much farther with significantly less effort.

Love yourself enough to do the work.

Jill Thomas CCHT
Healthy Habits Hypnosis
760-803-2841
www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com
http://www.facebook.com/healthyhabitshypnosis
Author of the book “Feed Your Real Hunger” & “30 day weight loss Jumpstart” Hypnosis CD
For more information and free hypnosis meditations visit www.healthyhabitshypnosis.com